Coming to the Truth
by lovetoreadseverusdotcom
Summary: AU. It's Harry's wedding day and he is having doubts. Hermione steps in to help him. Male/Male relationship. Harry/Severus. Best friend Hermione.
1. Chapter 1

Coming to the Truth

Harry is getting married today. Looking at himself in the tall mirror, Harry checks over himself to make sure his dress robes are straight and wrinkle free. Taking a deep breath, he thinks back to a time when he thought this day would never come. Having spent the past four years pining for a man he would never have. Someone much older than him, someone who was a Death Eater and bares the mark, but most importantly, someone who despises him to the core. Severus Snape would never consider being with him. Sighing, Harry moved to the window to watch the proceedings going on in the garden. He couldn't see her, but he could vaguely hear Mrs. Weasley directing the flow of incoming venders to where she wanted everything. It has to be perfect for her adopted son.

Thinking back on what brought him here to this time and place, he remembers Hermione telling him it was unhealthy to pine over someone if he wasn't going to act on it. That it was probably just a teenage crush. She wanted him to live, to go out and have fun, act more his age. But Harry just couldn't do those things and be happy about it because the person he wanted to do those things with was Severus and Severus hated him.

Every time he dresses up, he does it for him. Every time he shaves and wears cologne, he does it for him. Every time he walks the hallways of his old school, he wonders what he would say if they happen to run into each other. How could he play it off as just coincidence when all he wants to do is jump the man? He's always thinking of ways to see him even if only for a few seconds. When did he become so pathetic as to almost stalk someone he knows feels nothing but hatred for him? Gods he's so pathetic.

Hermione decided to help him forget about Severus. She began to set him up on several dates, most of them blind dates. At first it was a terrible idea, no one compared to his crush. No one quenched that desire he had to touch his skin, run his fingers through his hair and kiss those lips that always spewed vile things at him. No one made his stomach quiver and his palms sweat as he could, but he kept going out with these men and women to satisfy Hermione. Deep down in his gut he knew she was right…he had to move on.

Then one day, she set him up with a man that took his breath away on first sight. He gave this man his undivided attention and found that he had enjoyed their time together. They went on several more dates and Harry found that he didn't think of Severus so much anymore, especially while in the company Alan. Sometimes, he would wonder what Severus would say if he knew Harry was seeing someone. Would he be jealous? Probably not. That's silly. Why would he be jealous when he doesn't even like me. But still, the thought that he secretly did but didn't say anything was in the back of his mind. What would Severus do though. These thoughts occupied Harrys brain for too long and at one point he realized he had to stop. Stop living a fantasy in his mind and start living his life in the present. It wouldn't be easy, he loved Severus too much to forget, but he would try.

But Harry couldn't commit to a relationship with Alan with how he felt for the other man. It wouldn't be fair to string him along with how he felt. So, knowing this would end his relationship before it even started, he told his boyfriend about his crush. About the man he loves from afar and how he doesn't think he could ever love someone like they deserve while his heart belongs to another. Surprisingly his boyfriend understood, especially when he found out who Harry's crush was. He told Harry that as long as he didn't act on his crush then he was fine with it. He just wanted to get to know him as Harry. It's not like they were getting married or anything.

So, Harry and Alan did everything together. They went on vacations together, went to Quidditch matches together, cooked together, laughed together, cried together, they even went to all those horrible Balls together and Harry found that he was enjoying himself very much with Alan. He began to feel comfortable with him, was able to confide more with him than with anyone else besides Hermione. He began to see that there's someone right here and now that he could love so completely, so utterly completely. He had finally found happiness. Merlin, so much happiness.

Turning sideways to looking at himself in the mirror, he sighed and looked over to the door when it opened. Hermione came up behind him and smiled brightly. He turned to her, grabbed her hands, and squeezed them lightly. He's nervous and he's afraid. Doubt is having a field day in his head. What if they get married and then Severus tells him he feels the same way? What would he do? Would he stay faithful or would he cheat? It's a frightening thought and Harry has been sick with worry over it. Maybe this is the wrong thing to do. Maybe getting married is wrong, maybe he's not ready. He shouldn't have these thoughts on his wedding day, it's not right.

Hermione studied Harry's face. She had a feeling he would be second guessing himself and she was here to help him get past his doubts and see what's right in front of him. "Harry," Hermione softly says, "It's okay, you're supposed to be nervous. If you don't calm down, you're going to be sick and this is supposed to be the happiest day of your life." She's looking at him with worry and she brushes his hair away from his face. "Here, let me help you with your hair. Come sit."

Standing behind Harry while he sat in the chair in front of the vanity, she began to comb down his hair. "What are you worried about Harry? You have that look that your worried about something grave, what could you possibly be this upset about today of all days." She watched him through the vanity mirror and waited patiently for him to answer. She didn't have to wait long.

"What if this is wrong? What if I'm making a mistake, maybe we should wait." He wanted to keep expressing his fears, but his stomach chose that time to flip over, so he stopped. "Shit Hermione, we haven't even gone all the way yet. He said he would wait for me to be ready and I wanted to, but I could never do it. When he proposed I was surprised that he would want to build a life with me even though we haven't had sex yet." Harry said looking at his best friend through the mirror.

Looking a bit taken back with Harry's last statement, "Harry, you haven't had any sex? Ever?"

"Well, we have done things together, but we haven't actually had sex. I don't think I'm afraid of having sex as much as I'm afraid of hurting him by my actions. I'm afraid that I haven't gotten over Severus even though I found a wonderful person who I know loves me. Does this make me a horrible person? Oh God, I'm an awful person to be thinking I might be unfaithful to my husband on our wedding day." Covering his face, Harry starts to cry.

Hermione came around the chair and knelt in front of Harry. Taking both his wrists and exposing his face, she makes eye contact with him and says "Harry, you are a good person, a kind person and a very loyal person. You would never do anything like what your suggesting. It's just isn't in you to do something like that. Answer me this, 'Do you love Alan'?" Harry nodded yes. "Then that's all that matters. Today is a celebration of the love the two of you have for each other. And I know he loves you very much, Harry. You could never purposely hurt him because you've always been honest with him about your feelings." She stood up, keeping his hands in hers, "Harry, I must confess something to you. But before I do, I need you to understand why I did what I did." He looked nervously at her but inclined his head for her to continue. "I…you were so unhappy, and I tried to help you but nothing I did helped. So, I went to Hogwarts and confronted him about you."

Harry stiffened in his seat. "You did what?! You told him how I feel about him?" he said incredulously. "Merlin! How could you? Bloody hell!" He exclaims, jumping up from the chair and starting for the door. He can't go through with this wedding now. If there's any possibility that he could be with _him_ he has to take it. "How could you Hermione? I trusted you with something so special to me and you went behind my back and told him? What must he think of me?" Shaking his head and clutching his stomach, which has decided to do a double flip, he looks to his best friend with pained eyes.

"What did he say? When you told him, I mean?" he whispered. Sweating and heart racing, he could guess what he said, probably told her to get lost and he didn't want to hear anything that she had to say. But a small part of him was hoping that maybe he did harbor some feelings for him but…here he paused in his thinking. "When? When did you tell him?" He's been with Alan for two years now and not once did he hear from _him_. Not a letter or a note, not anything to encourage him that his feelings were returned.

She sook her head like she wasn't going to answer, "Three years ago. I told him three years ago, long before you met Alan." She told him. "Harry, I need you to understand that I told him to help you. You have no idea what it was like watching you lose yourself. If you weren't going to do something about then I was. He wasn't disgusted or even flattered. He just listened and then told me to leave him alone. That was it." She was terrified that this would ruin their friendship. This was not how she wanted to tell him what she did, but she couldn't let his doubt over his feelings continue when she prove to him that Severus didn't harbor feelings for him. She moved to stand in front of him, "Harry. Please don't hate me for this. I love you, you're my family. I just want you to be happy now that you can without the threat of war and Death Eaters." She watched his face for any sign of acceptance or anger, but she couldn't read him. "Harry…"

Deflated, he looked at Hermione and realized at this very second that the other man had absolutely no feelings for him whatso ever. It wasn't devastating to realize this nor was his heart broken. Funny, all those years wondering about Severus, almost worshipping him from afar, and he feels relieved. In fact, all he can think about is Alan and how much in love with him he is. How he's glad that he won't hurt him making his heart flutter with anticipation. Thinking of Alan, he can't help but smile and feel safe and secure. His heart beats just a little faster just knowing he's going to see him and when they are together nothing else seems to matter. All his worries seem simple, his life seems simple, he feels like he's finally a whole person. A complete Harry Potter. Who has a best friend that supports him, guides him, encourages him, makes him smile, debates with him, someone who's not afraid to tell him when he's being a prat and mostly someone who sees the 'Harry' in the person Harry Potter. He let out a sob as he reached for Hermione. Pulling her into a bone crushing hug he whispered in her ear, "I could never hate you, Hermione. In fact, I might just love you more for it. Today is my wedding day! And you helped me realize that I am truly in love with Alan." He pulled back and kissed her cheek. "I'm going to marry Alan, and I'm so happy, Hermione, so happy. Thank you!" Hugging her tightly one more time before stalking back to the tall mirror to fix his robes. Smiling and eyes sparkling, "Yup, I'm getting married today."

"Harry…" She wanted to question him on what he was feeling but watching him looking so happy she couldn't do it. Well, maybe just one question. "Harry, does this mean you're letting go of your obsession with the professor?" Biting her lip in anticipation of his answer.

Harry stopped smiling and turned to face his friend. "When you told me what you did, _three years ago,_ I wasn't happy with you. But you told him _three years_ ago, Hermione, and I can't help thinking that if he had any sort of feelings for me he would have said so or engaged me in some type of way. He didn't. Not once have I heard from him, not once has he let on that he knew my feelings. I realized just now that that doesn't hurt me. The thought of him not wanting me has left me feeling free not anguish. I feel free to love Alan with no doubts now. I'm feeling so much happiness right now. Thank you for telling me but you should have told me three years ago, you know." He tilted his head and smirked.

"Merlin Harry, thank you!" She came behind him and hugged him. "Alan is so lucky. Are you ready to go? It's almost time."

He turned around smiling brightly, "Hermione, how do I look? I need to be perfect on my wedding day." She hugged him then smoothed out the wrinkles she created. They both laughed.

"Oh Harry! You're so beautiful and Alan won't be able to wait for the honeymoon to jump you!" She laughed, turning him back to the mirror to have one last check. "Alan is so lucky to have you, Harry. You and Alan will be very happy and I'm so happy for you." Now she was crying, realizing that her best friend has finally realized himself that you have to live in the present and not in the past or in daydreams. "I'm going to go out and check on Alan, then I'll be back to get you. You will be here when I come back, right?" She said this with a serious face and Harry almost believed she meant that question.

"Of course, I'll be here, Alan is mine and I want this Hermione, I want this more than I ever thought I would. Thank you for that and thank you for helping me see what has always been right in front of me and not allowing me to make the worst mistake I could ever make. I love you, Hermione." Hugging her one more time before she left.

He is getting married today. Looking at himself in the tall mirror, he checked over himself to make sure his dress robes are straight and wrinkle free. He takes a deep breath. This is it. He's going to get married to the man he loves, to the man that makes him _feel loved._ Yes, he's not going to look back anymore to what-if's. This is his future and he's going to embrace it completely. Smiling at his reflection he realized that he feels lighter now that he let it go. He should have done that years ago, so immature, but now…he feels great. He feels happier, he feels euphoric but mostly he's feeling so much love for Alan, for their future together. For Hermione for helping him finally see what he should have long ago, and finally he feels love for himself because if he didn't love himself he could never accept love from Alan and his family.

The door opened, and Hermione came in, "Let's go Harry. It's time." Laughing at the sight of Harry, she said "You look so peaceful now Harry, I'm so glad. Are you ready to go? Alan is in place and I can tell you he's a bit nervous. He's trying not to show it, but I can tell. Come on before he thinks you're not coming."

"Okay, let's get me married and when you can't find us after the ceremony, don't come looking for us. I have two years of love to make up to my husband and I intend to start right away." They both laughed and left the room.

-Lovetoreadseverusdotcom


	2. Chapter 2

Coming to The Truth

Alan is in his room getting ready for his wedding. He's nervous and anxious about today. Would Harry go through with it? Would he back out at the last minute? All these thoughts are swimming in his mind, and he can't' stop them. Maybe this is a mistake. Maybe he shouldn't have pushed this on Harry so soon. Only two years together but the thought of not being with Harry is crushing.

Pacing his room for the last fifteen minutes thinking about his life with Harry for the last two years. When they first started dating Harry told him that his heart belonged to another, that he couldn't love anyone because of it. Then he told him it was that professor of potions at Hogwarts. He's heard stories about this Severus Snape fellow, and they weren't all good. So what that he was a spy for the light and a war hero in his own right. It hurt to know that Harry was pining for him even when they were together. He remembers telling Harry that he didn't care about the crush as long as he didn't act on it. Since that day, they did everything together, went everywhere together. Alan knew early on in the relationship that he was falling in love. Falling in love with Harry so deeply that he tried so hard to keep Harry's focus on him. Was he wrong for that? Did he manipulate Harry by doing this? Gods, he just can't lose him now. Pacing in front of the window, he could hear Mrs. Weasley talking to the caterers. Something about the desert table and the wedding cake display. He knows this is crazy! He knows that Harry loves him, but does he love him enough to forget about that other man, to let him go and be happy with him.

That's his worst fear…that Harry hasn't moved on from him, that he's just settling. This man, who he has never met, has always been the third person in their relationship.

Turning to the closet, he needed to get his clothes and change. His worst fear was Harry backing out and this fear is what's driving him right now. There are too many 'what if's' and doubts going through his head right now, that going through with the wedding today would be a mistake. Feeling he manipulated Harry to some degree didn't help either. Taking out his black slacks and laying them across the bed, he turned to the door when he hears a knock. "It's open." He says, and the door opens and Hermione walks in.

"Alan, what are you doing?" Hermione asks but it's obvious he's about to bolt. What is it with these two men? Does she have to do everything?

"I don't...I mean…I can't…Hermione…" he looked so dejected to her and she came to place her hand on his arm. "What exactly are you afraid of?"

He looked to his friend and sighed. Sitting on the bed and hanging his head, he runs both hands through his hair and squeezes. "What am I doing Hermione? Am I doing the right thing? I mean, Merlin…I'm afraid he won't be there. That he'll chicken out for fear that he will lose what he thinks he has with _him_. I just can't go through that. I just can't." shaking his head slightly and whispering over and over again, "I just can't" until Hermione breaks his train of thought.

"Alan, I just came from seeing Harry." Alan looked up at this. "He looks handsome and he's excited for the ceremony. I know that he thinks he has feeling for _him_ , but how can you have feelings for someone you never see? Someone you haven't spent any time with, talked with or laughed with? What Harry has is feelings of what he wants his life to be. He wants to experience love and conversation with his equal and he wants to have laughter in his life because he's had so little of it. I don't know what happened between them that would cause Harry to latch onto him as someone he could love but it will take all your love to show him that you're everything he needs in his life. Alan let me ask you, 'Do you love Harry'?" She looks at him with her serious face and he knew he couldn't lie to her.

"Very much so. Merlin, I can't imagine my life without him, but I don't know if I can live with another person in our marriage." He said sadly. Why does everything have to be so hard? "Hermione, how is he? When you saw him, how is he feeling, really?" The concern for Harry evident in his features.

"Well, to be honest he was freaking out when I first got there. He was having the same doubts you are right now, only he wasn't running away when I got there. I just helped him see what was right in front of him." She walked to the chair by the bed and sat. Smoothing out the invisible wrinkles on her robe, looking back to her friend with an expectant look she said "Well are you going to explain to me what exactly you were thinking? Running away? That's not like you, Alan." As she crossed her arms and waited.

What was he thinking? He loves Harry more than he could have ever imagined loving someone. All he has ever needed is Harry. Harry completed him, made him want to be better, challenged him and he knows Harry loves him. But does he love him enough to let go of Severus? Over the past two years he has gotten to know the real Harry, the person who is scared of being alone, the person who didn't grow up with love and so desperately seeks it out. The person who wants his own children to shower with affection, something that he never received growing up. Harry is a strong and powerful wizard, but he would never hold that against anyone or above anyone. He is humble and kind and loyal and just so damn lovable. Alan just wants to take him away from all the bad in the world and make him happy. So, what _was_ he thinking?

Ever since he can remember, he's only loved Harry. Thinking back, he can't remember a time when Harry wasn't in the forefront of his mind, so what the hell _**was**_ he thinking?

"I'm so confused Hermione. I love him, I really do. I'm not a quitter, not a deserter either but I must confess I was going to leave and let Harry go." Not looking at her directly he just kept staring at the floor.

"I'm well aware you were leaving. I never pegged you for a coward, Alan." He looks up at her surprised, not believing Hermione just called him out. "I'm disappointed that you felt the need to run and not talk to Harry first. He _is_ going to be your husband. Don't you think you should talk to him about your fears, about your doubts before you turn tail and run? Do I think your fears are founded, yes I suppose I did at one point. Do I think Harry will 'chicken out' as you say? He could but he won't. Harry will talk things out before he does anything crazy. If not with the person he's afraid of hurting then with someone he trusts and has no fear of being judged by." She took a breath to continue her tirade, but Alan cut her off.

"Harry's afraid he'll hurt me? Why would he be afraid of hurting me?" Alan just couldn't understand what Harry was thinking.

"Harry never once had any doubts when it came to you and your love. He knows you love him, and he loves you. He was afraid that he would do something to ruin your life together, something concerning Severus. I just listened to him and reminded him of his love for you and that he's not the kind of person to do hurtful and malicious things to the people he loves. I didn't tell him what to do, I just listened and pointed out that you love him, want the same things as him, and that you'll be waiting for him in the garden when the time comes. Did I just lie to him?" She asked, and she couldn't keep the venom out of her voice.

Shaking his head, he thought about what Harry must be going through. They've had many talks about _him_ , and many arguments about him too, but one thing has always been true. They were always honest with each other, have been since the very beginning of their relationship. Why is it now he's questioning what he's doing when just yesterday they talked for hours about how they feel about each other, about having a family and buying a house and growing old together. What does it say about Harry's love for him that he's worried about hurting him? Harry doesn't have a mean bone in his body and when they become husbands, he knows Harry will stay loyal, faithful, and true because that's the kind of person he is. For him to question himself…Alan starts to chuckle, softly at first until it turns into flat out laughter.

"How we must look to you! Two men acting like scared kittens! Of course, Harry is freaking out, he hasn't figured out yet that he's living his life and not wishing for his life. And I intend to show him every day that life with me will be happy and fruitful. I'm not going to run and I'm sorry I even thought about it. You're a good friend Hermione, not only to Harry but to me too. I'm not sure where he would be if you weren't in his life. Oh God, I can't believe I almost left, that would have been the worst mistake I ever made. I love that man, Hermione, love him so much."

Standing from the chair, Hermione came over to Alan and straighten his robes. "Harry has picked a good man in you Alan. I know you will make him very happy and he will make you very happy. You better do right by him, he's my best friend or I will have to hex you." She said with a smile and he knew underneath the joking she was serious.

"Let's get this show on the road. I want to snog my husband senseless and then some. For some reason I feel the need for makeup sex?" Laughing at himself he started for the door. Loosening his collar, "Thanks Hermione." He said over his shoulder and she followed him to the garden before turning back to get Harry.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: I originally posted this story as an OC, but I always wanted it to be a Snarry. So, after re-reading the story, I decided to make it a Snarry by adding a third chapter. I reworked the first two chapters so if you're reading this last chapter you should go back and re-read the first two. I think it came out okay. I certainly like it much better. Please review and let me know if it flowed okay or whether you enjoyed it or not.**_

 _ **Enjoy!**_

Chapter 3

Severus closed his office door and leaned against it. The nerve of some people assuming things about him. Who does she think she is coming here and telling him lies about Britain's resident hero! Pushing himself off the door, he headed towards his liquor cabinet. He's been drinking more these days since the war ended. Funny, you would think he would have drank like a fish during the war but being a spy, he had to keep his mind alert. But now that it's all over, the only thing he can think about is plundering a certain dark haired green eyed boy.

He's been hiding away in this school trying to keep his mind off him. Keeping his thoughts closer to his own age, because he truly, _**truly**_ wanted to make Harry his. To kiss those lips, to touch him; run his hands down his fit body, to lavish kisses on every inch of that beautiful skin, to taste his flavor and savor it, and to finally feel Harry around his member, encasing him entirely as he pummels into that tight heat. Closing his eyes and pushing down on his erection, he swallowed his drink in one. How could he have these feeling for someone so young? He's twenty years older than the boy, he's lived two of his lifetimes! Which actually felt like two different lifetimes. Laughing at himself, he downed another glass and poured a third.

Walking to the bookcase across the room, the one that Albus stocked for him as a Yule gift one year and ran his fingers across the tomes there, sipping his drink this time. Stopping his fingers over a new book he's never seen before. It felt new, stiff, and not worn. Pulling it out and turning it over in his hand, he was confused as to where it came from. There was no title or any type of writing on any side of the book. Walking back to his comfy chair to browse the tome, he put his drink down and picked up his wand. The spy in him needed to scan the book before he even thought of opening it. When it came back clean, he waved it at the fireplace to start the fire and sat.

The book is unlike any book he's ever read before. First when he opened it it was blank. Flipping through the pages he could see that all the pages were blank. So, this is a journal then. How did this journal get on the shelf? Who put it there?

Just as he was about to close the book and throw it on the table in disgust, writing began to appear on the cover. ' _Wishful Magic and Its Uses_ '. What the hell? Grabbing his wand once again, he scanned it again this time with more darker spells. Tom Riddle's Diary coming to mind scaring the shit out of him.

Nothing again. So…what the hell? Opening the book once more, he flipped to the second page and watched as the writing started and seemed to never stop.

 _The Cor Cupere Ritual_

 _This is a blood ritual that enables the participant to make a wish by asking Magic itself. By enacting this ritual, you enter into an agreement with Magic that has some give and take on both sides. The consequences are not written in stone and are unique to the individual. The participant must be pure in their intentions and true in their wish, for if you are not Magic will take your life as payment. No second chances. However, if the intentions are accepted by Magic the wish will be granted and payment made. There is no going back once a wish is fulfilled, so the participant must be confidant in their endeavor._

The writing kept going but all Severus focused on were the words 'wish and magic'. What is this? This is a dark ritual by all accounts and Severus can't understand why it's even in his rooms. Glancing back to the bookcase had him thinking about Albus again. Did he put this here? Did he know that deep down Severus wished he was younger to pursue Harry? That he _**wanted**_ Harry that way? Oh god! Severus wiped a hand down his tired face taking a deep breath to calm his heart. Albus knew everything it seemed so why wouldn't he know how I really felt for the boy! Oh god! No! There is no way he knew! I didn't even know how I felt until the final battle when I saw the boy in the shack. Those green eyes, that face. That's when it hit me that I wanted more with the boy turned man. So…not Albus then. But who?

Looking back to the book to peruse the details of the ritual, Severus seriously contemplated his options. Could he do this? Are his intentions pure enough to Magic for his wish to be granted? What would his payment be? Laughing out a sob, was he seriously thinking about wishing to be younger just to have Harry?

Yes. Hell Yes. A thousand times, Yes! For Harry he would consider anything, even for the chance of being with him as his friend and confidant he would do anything. Just the thought of being able to hold him, to love him, to look upon his face all the time just because he wanted to is warming his heart. A feeling he's never felt before is spreading over his body and his arousal becoming more obvious. He's only felt this way in his dreams, dreams of loving Harry. He loves him, he knows that, has for a while now. Loves him with all his being, he can admit now if only to himself. Finding this book now, after that Granger girl shows up here cannot be a coincidence. There's no way she put this book on his shelf, she never made it past the foyer, so who else has access to his rooms that might possibly know about his feelings for Harry? Putting the book on the table, he decided to take a shower. He's drunk so making decisions in this state would not be wise.

XXxxXX

The next morning while sitting at his table drinking tea, he pulls the book back to himself. Flipping it open at any point he can see that all the pages have filled in. Strange that it was blank the first time he opened it. He was turning the pages back to the front when someone knocked on his door. He knew from his wards that it was the Headmistress. He waved his wand to let her in.

"In the kitchen Minerva." He said as he closed the book and tried to slide it off the table before she would see it. Not fast enough though.

"Good Morning Severus. Ah, I see you found the book I left for you." Sitting at the table and summoning a tea cup, adding cream and sugar before she continued. "I was wondering when you would find it. Albus left it for me to give to you with some cryptic message. Oh, what was it?" She tapped her mouth while looking to the ceiling. "Oh yes, he said 'One day Severus will want something that he believes he does not deserve. Give him this book and tell him…'Go for it'." Taking a sip of her tea and sitting back in her chair she continued. "I came to give it to you after the final battle, to tell you what he said, but you were not yourself Severus. You have been unusually unhappy since that battle and I just couldn't see that his words would help you at the time. So, I put the book on the shelf and hoped one day you might find it." She looked him straight in the eyes trying to read what was going on in that brilliant mind of his. "Well Severus?"

"Minerva, do you know what this book is?" He placed it on the table facing her so she could read the title. She looked over at it and read the title out loud, " ' _Contemplating Magic'_ , is it a goodbook Severus? I don't understand what Albus was thinking."

"I think I do. What did you come down here for Minerva?" He thinks he knows but he wants to hear her say it.

"Severus, you know that Ms. Granger is a close acquaintance of mine. She confides in me when she needs a female opinion. Need I say more?" She arched an eyebrow at the potion master, demanding him to answer truthfully.

Snapping his jaw closed and bearing his teeth at her, "What is it exactly you think I'm going to confess to you? How would I know what that girl confided in you!" His face shut off and his body stiff, she cannot possibly know anything!

Minerva had the audacity to laugh. She patted his hand, stood up and turned to the door. She glanced over her shoulder and smirked, "I know what that book really is, Severus, and I agree with Albus. You should go for it. You deserve happiness just like everyone else." Then she was gone.

Severus just stared after her. Has this world gone mad? Taking the book back to his chair in front of the fire, he again opened the book to the ritual. Specifically, what he would need to perform it. Yeah, he's whipped. He knew the second he read about this 'wish magic' that he was going to do it. He would do anything for Harry even if it killed him. Although he hoped this wouldn't.

 _Using your own blood, make a circle using the runes shown below. Make sure that the runes are in the correct order and drawn precisely. Place yourself in the center of the circle in your birthday suit and nothing else. Using Dandelions, blow the peddles across the runes starting from the north of the circle and continue clockwise to complete the circle. Once the runes are covered in the dandelion peddles say your wish out loud all the while keeping your thoughts on the wish only. Any deviation in this could cause Magic to construe unpure motives and end the ritual and taking payment with your life. If Magic accepts the wish, there will be a bright yellow light and the taking of payment before the wish is granted. Unfortunately, we are not able to tell you what happens during payment or the act of receiving the wish. This ritual is considered a dark ritual and the only ones to ever use it would never reveal the fact that they used it._

Severus closed the book. This weekend is a Hogsmeade weekend, so the castle will be mostly empty. He will perform the ritual then in the bowels of the dungeons.

XXxxXX

Minerva stayed in the Great Hall after breakfast. She knew this would be the weekend that Severus would do whatever it is he's going to do. Albus wouldn't shut up about it, sounding excited at the possibilities. The castle's magic hummed loudly in her bones that all was well at the moment, and she knew the castle magic would alert her if anything became amiss. Also, Severus wasn't at breakfast this morning. Yes, something is definitely in the air this weekend.

Around noon the same day, there was a disturbance in the castle's magic. It felt fuzzy like looking at the sun through thick fog. Minerva walked out of the Great Hall and followed the pull of the disturbance. This is it. This is what she's been waiting for since that day in Severus' rooms. She hoped it went well and his wish was granted. If anyone deserved happiness and love it's that man. He had it hard from the beginning with his family and then the Marauders at school. She knew his life wasn't easy for him and that's why he turned to that maniac, Voldemort. He just wanted to feel wanted and valuable to someone even if his values were a bit skewed.

She was sad at what she thought he'd become. Thinking he was on the wrong side of the war and not learning the truth until after the final battle. When Harry, of all people, defended him. When the truth came out, she was just as shocked as the rest of the world. She was Albus' second in command of this school and she thought she knew him fairly well. He didn't even trust her enough to tell her any of the horrible things that were going on. She forgave him, eventually, she did have a school to run.

Making her way through the dungeons, she past the potions lab and noticed a faint yellow glow permeating the hallway. She let her wand fall into her hand as she slowly followed the glow this way and that way until she finally came to an unused classroom with the door locked and warded. She would recognize Severus' warding anywhere. Slowly and cautiously she unraveled the wards and unlocked the door. Pushing it open slowly and entering the classroom, she spotted a naked figure lying still on the floor.

"Lumos!" she hollered and ran to the form on the floor. "Merlin!" Grabbing his shoulders and turning him over she gasped. "Oh my! Severus! What have you done!" Shaking him rigorously now to waken him. She waved her wand over his form to check vitals before sighing. "He's alive." She breathed out a sigh of relief. "What have you done? In my wildest dreams this was not what I expected." She said to more to herself then to anyone in particular.

Severus stayed unconscious and Minerva's mind went into overdrive. Conjuring a stretcher with blankets, she levitated her now _**young**_ potions master to the infirmary ward. On the way up to the infirmary all she could think about is what the hell has he done? Thank Merlin it is a Hogsmeade weekend and most of the kids are out of the Castle. How is she going to explain this? Why would he wish to be younger? And by the looks of him, he's around twenty, so that would make him twenty years younger, but why? What did he wish for? None of this was making sense to her, but there won't be any answers until he wakes up. "Poppy! Come quick!" she yelled as they entered the infirmary.

It took Minerva a few minutes to explain what needed to be said to Poppy while Mediwitch looked over Severus. Getting her to agree to a vow of silence was difficult but Minerva demanded it and Poppy had no choice but to agree. "I don't know what's going on, but I expect to be filled in. He's just sleeping now, Minerva. He's a healthy twenty year old. What exactly is going on here?" The Mediwitch stated in hushed whispers.

Just then Severus moaned and moved his head towards them. Poppy was at his side in an instant, waving her wand muttering her charms. He tried to sit up, but he fell back and moaned again. "What's happened? Where am I?" He looked around recognizing the place as a hospital of some type. "Hello? Please, where am I?" He croaked out, terrified that he can't remember anything before waking up now.

"Child, do you remember who you are? Where you are?" She questioned, thinking she was going to kill Albus if he knew this is what Severus was going to do.

"I seem to have forgotten…what's going on?" he looked and felt lost. He hated this feeling and he hated people seeing him this way. "Who are you? Someone please answer me!" trying again to get up only to be pushed back down by the Mediwitch.

"You had an accident. You're in the infirmary at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Relax dear, just lay back down, you need to rest a bit more. My name is Poppy, and I expect you to call me that, don't you worry about your memories dear, this happens sometimes.

'Oh, Severus what have you done to yourself?' She thought to herself and a glance at Minerva she could see the Headmistress was thinking the same thing.

XXxxXX

Minerva left the hospital wing, headed to her office, putting together her conversation she wanted to have with the former Headmaster. She knew it wouldn't go the way she wanted but when did anything go right when it came to Severus?

"Albus. Did you know what Severus was going to wish for? And if you did, how could you not tell me?! I should have been more prepared!" She all but screamed at him as she entered her office. The other portraits immediately left their frames not wanting to see Minerva's temper. It wouldn't be pretty.

"I take it Severus has performed the wishing ritual? And did it work? Is he alright?" Albus inquired with much concern in his voice. He knew what Severus wanted but he wasn't all that positive that Severus would go though with it. The payment could be anything and some people would feel the unknown risk was not worth it. Secretly though he was beaming at his friend for taking the risk. He must love Harry very much to put himself through that. "I wasn't sure his love for Harry would be enough for the risk." He whispered under his breath, but Minerva heard him anyway, what with her cat hearing and all.

 _ **What the hell?!**_

Minerva was taken aback. Harry? Severus loves Harry Potter? Oh, my stars! That would explain his wish. His wish to be young, to be the same age as Harry. Poor Severus. But now is not the time to ponder that.

"He's young Albus! Twenty years younger! And he has no memory of who he is or his life! Why would you want him to do this to himself?!" They stared at each other for a minute, "Albus! What were you thinking!"

"I was thinking that my friend is lonely and sad. I was thinking that my friend deserves love and happiness, but he would never have gone after it. He believed he was too old for young Harry, he believed he didn't deserve someone of Harry's caliber and he certainly didn't believe he could ever have Harry as his lover and partner. Minerva, he loves Harry, very much so, and I felt that if he used wish magic, he could gain what he so desperately wanted. I wasn't sure exactly what he would wish for, but I was hoping for this one." He looked to his prodigy and smiled. His all knowing smile that reached all the way to his eyes and beyond. Minerva knew she wasn't going to like what came next.

"Minnie"

Oh shit.

"Come to my portrait and pull the right side. When you do it will swing open and reveal a hidden alcove. You won't be able to see anything but it's there. Reach your hand all the way in to the back and pull out the large envelope. Don't look at me like that, I promise all will right with the world." He waited for her to do as he asked. When she did, she sat at her desk facing Albus holding the envelope.

"What is this Albus? What have you done and more pressing, when did you do it?" rolling the envelope over and over in her hands.

"Open it"

When she did, she found documents, vault information, school records for one Alan Theodore Walker. Minerva looked up to her friend, "What is this?"

"This is Severus' new identity. Bring him up to your office and instead of telling him he's Severus Tobias Snape, you'll give him Alan's identity. I have worked it all out, there is money in his vaults and all his credentials are good and legal. Tell him he was here for an interview to be a professor but that he's over qualified. Give him the envelope before he leaves. He has a house just outside London, let him floo there. It's all pretty simple really." He beamed at her and she could tell he was extremely proud of himself.

Yes, Albus was very happy how things turned out. Having Severus lose his memories made it much easier for him to assume the Alan identity. Although he will miss his chats with his friend, he is very happy that his friend took the risk to be happy, decided to be selfish and dangers-be-damned, take the leap of faith to have love.

XXxxXX

Six months later Minerva walked into the Leaky Cauldron, she was meeting Alan for lunch. They've kept in touch these last months and have formed a solid friendship. As Minerva sat herself at a booth, Hermione saw her from across the way and came over to say hello. "Minerva! How nice to run into you! Are you eating alone? I'm meeting Ron but I'm sure he wouldn't mind if you joined us. I…"

"Hermione!" she chuckled. "I'm afraid I'll have to decline. I'm meeting someone for lunch. Oh, and here he is!" She stood from the booth as Alan approached and smiled towards him. "Alan, so nice to see you again! I'd like to introduce you to a friend, this is Hermione Granger."

"It's nice to meet you, Alan." The two shook hands all the while Hermione couldn't keep the smile off her face. Oh yes, I'm definitely introducing him to Harry.

XXxxXX

 _ **A/N: I actually have an idea for a fourth chapter, but I don't know. Please review and let me know what you think of this version and whether or not I should add that fourth chapter. Thanks!**_

 _ **-lovetoreadseverusdotcom-**_

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